It’s the relationship, stupid

I’ve been planning public relations, advertising and marketing communications strategies for almost 30 years. And for all three decades, my blood pressure has risen when I’ve asked about the objectives of such assignments and heard: “We need to get our message out,” or “We need to raise awareness” or, heaven forbid, “We need a brochure.”

These phrases mess with my EKG because they presume that merely sending messages at people will achieve some result. (It will, of course. It will make lots of money for the message-makers and the media by which those messages are sent.) But more often than not—especially in this day and age of clutter and overload—one-way communication isn’t da bomb; it just bombs.

So what works? Instead of sending messages at people, build relationships with people. Instead of slick, self-serving sales pitches, engage people in genuine conversations based on their interests. Instead of lazy, outdated, one-size-fails-with-all mass communication, have personalized, individualized interactions with just the right masses.

That’s why Hetrick’s static Web site is dead. That’s why we’re not a public relations firm; we’re a firm that builds relationships with publics. That’s why I’m not writing an e-mail at you, I’m asking you to converse with me. You’re up.

10 Responses to “It’s the relationship, stupid”


  1. 1 Kate

    I appreciate your thoughts. Do you believe it is about building relationships, or is it simply not in the nature of PR professionals to confess it is about the cash? We can package it any way we want, but isn’t that why we’re here - to drive sales leads, to capture the client, to sell the product, to get more donations, to become top of mind? Building relationships might be the means - or a means - but however you get there, the pot o’ gold better be at the end.

  2. 2 Jim Bright

    Bruce, I’m going to share this one with Indiana University PR students and graduates. I agree totally. Too often, we tell people what we want them to hear — and maybe not what they want or need to hear. Our messages are totally “sender driven.” Relationships — listening as well as sharing — are critical. Bringing people into your circle of friends makes you luckier, more successful and more valuable to yourself and your organizations.

  3. 3 Jason

    Of course we’re in for the money, Kate. And there’s nothing wrong with that. You’re missing Bruce’s point. We are now in an era where markets have become conversations and the consumer is more empowered and smarter than ever before. So you can’t just talk at them, you must talk with them. They have become totally inured to the propaganda model.

    Companies and organizations that engage consumers and listen carefully to the feedback will thrive in this environment. Those who continue to market “old school” will not. The same will be true for those of us who advise them.

    As far as the “pot ‘o gold” goes, this is one Irishman who has no compunction with regard to getting paid for what I do well. I’ll be happy to pass my serving of self-loathing down to the lawyers and politicians.

  4. 4 Bailey

    I really appreciate your new format. If building relationships is truly the means to creating effective communications, than interactivity goes a long way to cultivate that relationship. And I’ll be the first to say that no, not all PR pros are in it for the cash. Why would people dedicate their lives to nonprofits? Perhaps we should take the time to look at the good that can be done with PR for little to no cash. That is something that has drawn me to the industry.

    I may be a newbie, but let’s hope what she says isn’t true. Thanks for the change Hetrick; I really like the new website format.

  5. 5 Joseph Michael

    Well done and well said.

  6. 6 Larry

    You’re the man.

  7. 7 Austin

    He’s not the man. He’s the dad.

  8. 8 Todd

    No marketing ever achieved anything that didn’t result in a response - whether you call that response a conversation, or a purchase decision, an altered perception, a charitable contribution or a vote at the polls, we’re still talking about generating response from a target audience. Sometimes those responses, or conversations, are ongoing, and other times it’s a one-time objective.
    But, don’t short sell the medium that delivers the message and starts the conversation. I got here because I received an email from Hetrick - probably the same message that went to a lot of Hetrick friends and clients. And if you want to start a conversation with thousands, or even millions of potential customers, supporters, voters - whomever - mass media is often the most efficient way to do that.
    You’ve got to choose the most efficient and best targeted tactic (medium) to start the conversation, and then know what to do with it once it begins!

  9. 9 Rodger D. Johnson

    Bruce,

    You may be interested in my most recent post, “Putting ‘Relation’ Back Into Relationships.” For the past few years, I’ve been studying the research of cognitive linguist George Lakoff who has been studying metaphors and how those shape our thoughts and perceptions. He’s noted for saying “If the facts don’t fit the frame, the facts bounce off, and the frame stays.” By the way, very nice blog. I like the layout — content too.

  10. 10 Mary

    Thumbs up. … Arm chair marketing doesn’t work (or at least produce the highest call-to-action rate), especially in today’s splintered and highly competitive marketplace. Collateral provides support, but the highest ROI comes from good old conversation.

Leave a Reply